It is essential to have an attitude of believing the best in others.


The self-fulfilling prophecy refers to the idea that when someone creates a belief in something that is not yet true, and expects it with certainty, it will become true.  With people, this suggests that as we communicate our expectations, they will conform and deliver the appropriate results.

When working with people, this is critical.  When you express a lack of confidence in someone, it is returned with mediocrity, however if you believe in them and expect them to do well, research has shown that they will live up to that expectation.

What we expect, all too often, is exactly what we get.

Here are the four key principles of the self-fulfilling prophecy:

  1. We form certain expectations, or beliefs, of people or events based on our own perceptions and experiences.
  2. We communicate those expectations through our behaviors.
  3. People generally respond by adjusting their behavior to match.
  4. The result is that the original expectation becomes reality.

Based on these principles, we can conclude that the expectations leaders place on their team determines the quality of the teams’ output. A study of 100 self-made millionaires has shown that the most common characteristic in the group was the desire and ability to see the good in others. They were people builders, not critics. They empowered and supported their team to be their very best through positive means. 

Believing the best in people is a critical piece of building successful viable relationships.



May 28, 2013 — 2 Comments

Being thankful every day for what you have is a mind altering experience.  Try this quick and easy exercise every day.  Wake up and immediately say what you are grateful for.  It could be as simple as another day on earth or your feet touching the ground. The ability to breathe… or you could get more involved – and be grateful for a specific person, condition, thing, whatever it is in your life that you are grateful for. 

GratitudeThere are half full and half empty people all around us.  The half full group has their glass filled with gratitude.  Gratitude is one of those emotions that can increase wellbeing and happiness among those who deliberately create it.  Gratitude can also increase energy, optimism and empathy; all characteristics of positive happy people.

Imagine being aware of all the good things that surround you.  Imagine how much easier it would be to handle diversity and opposition when you have this upbeat attitude?  Imagine having a purpose in life, an appreciation for those around you, and a willingness to take action to show your feeling of gratitude. 

Those are the ingredients to a more fulfilled and balanced life. Focus on the big and the small things to show your gratitude.  You will find that as you express this new attitude, you will emit a positive energy or aura that will attract into your life exactly what you need to proceed and succeed. 

Gratitude is a state of mind that we all have access to.  It takes practice and with practice, it reaps great benefits.

What are you grateful for today?



May 6, 2013 — 2 Comments

 We all have goals.  Each and every one of us. Some of us think we gave up a long time ago and don’t have any, but we do.  Every day we wake up with the goal to live another day.  Ok, maybe that is a stretch but don’t we all have goals to some extent?  And why is it so important to have goals? Goals

 The most successful people on this planet didn’t wake up one day with an idea and a few minutes later become successful… No way.  They had an idea and they developed a plan.  Within that plan there were goals – some big, some little – some attainable, some way out there. 

 And each day, they worked at it – chipping away, having triumphs and failures along the way but tweaking and re-evaluating and working toward goals. Goals!

 We have had goals from the day we were born.  Sit up. Crawl. Walk. Talk. Feed ourselves. Dress ourselves. Express ourselves. Make friends. Learn. Communicate. Develop relationships. Learn a skill.  Get a job. Get married.  Have a family. Buy a car. Buy a house. Take a vacation…. Many of these things are milestones that we can only achieve with a plan of action and goal setting. 

 Goals are objectives that you intend to achieve.  Going through life without goals is like getting in your car and driving aimlessly expecting to arrive at your destination without a clue of how to get there. 

 Moving through life without a roadmap and expecting to reach certain milestones haphazardly is certainly one way to go but if you want to get somewhere quickly and with less energy and time, then set goals, work towards them and you will find yourself exactly where you wanted to be.

We should set goals for each area of our lives; but it works best when we are working towards a primary goal.

Do you have a primary goal that you are working towards?


 I now know why seeing people overcome… moves me to tears. It’s because that’s exactly what I did. OVERCOME. For me it was a low self-image, I had to learn to believe in myself and my potential.

 photoGrowing up, I wasn’t good-looking and my brother, who was a year older was Mr. GQ himself! He was quite the looker and did all that he could to fit the part. He was always well dressed in the latest fashion and knew how to pour on the charm… I, on the other hand, was short, fat, and could hardly find clothes to fit much less be in style. I had a big chip on my front tooth, parted my hair in the center resulting in two big puffs of hair.

People, including my family, often made fun of me and called me names like, Stumbo or King Tubby or Platunk. (This came from the big noise and waves that formed whenever I jumped into the pool).

 This bothered me a lot especially at the age when I started liking girls. Whenever my brother and friends got together they would talk about their exploits with girls and I had nothing to talk about.

 Later in life my parents were surprised to hear about how I struggled with this because they raised me in a stable home filled with love. They didn’t know how much what other people thought, said and did had affected me.

 When I came to know God and discovered who and whose I was, things started to change. My image improved when I learned how much God loves and believes in me. Its been a process of letting go of my limiting beliefs and relying on His belief in me and though I have come a long way… I am still a work in progress…

 Do you realize how special you really are? Do you realize that no one else is quite like you? You have amazing capabilities!

  People who overcome, dig deep within and discover how special they really are and how much they have to offer. They get rid of their limiting beliefs and muster up the courage to be who they are and not allow fear or what others think to get in the way. They work hard to discover and develop their strengths, passion and purpose.

Paul Martinelli said, “When you doubt your power you give power to your doubt.”